Top 5: Are you an Old School Gamer?
Ever since I started doing the video of the week a few months ago I have been itching to also write an article. After reading all the great Top 5s I have been trying to figure out a good one for me to write. Originally I thought it would be on The Legend of Zelda but I haven’t really played the new games so I thought I couldn’t do the series justice. Then I figured since I am apparently so damn old, why not look back in time when video games were a huge part of my life. So here we go….
5. You remember when Punch Out was Mike Tyson’s game.
Once upon a time Mike Tyson was the baddest man on the planet. He knocked out every one he fought in dramatic fashion. His fights usually ended with in a few rounds if they even made it out of the first. He became the most popular fighter since Ali, so much so that he got he got his own video game. Mike Tyson’s Punch Out was a huge seller producing great characters like King Hippo, Von Kaiser and Bald Bull. Then if you were good enough to get through all of these characters you got to test your luck against the man himself Iron Mike Tyson. Just like in real life he was basically impossible to beat. I remember using a Game Genie that made me invincible and I still couldn’t beat him. But then Iron Mike’s personal life took a turn for a worse. Mike was charged and convicted with raping a woman and Nintendo knew they couldn’t they have him on the cover of their most popular games. Enter Mr Dream. Since there wasn’t another boxer even close to Iron Mike’s popularity Nintendo created a new boss that was just as crazy hard as Tyson. And just like Iron Mike, Mr. Dream sent you packing before you could say “Little Mac”.
4. You had to blow in a game that wouldn’t work.
I’m 7 years old and I wake up at 6 AM on a Saturday morning wanting nothing more to play a rousing game of Burgertime on my Nintendo. I pop it in and await playing as a Chef running over buns and meat squashing walking eggs. I hit power and get a blank screen. I take out the game and do what millions of people would do for years to try and fix their games…I blew in the game. If you had a Nintendo, Sega, SNES or any other system that used a cartage you tried to fix those dusty games with by blowing in them. After blowing in Burgertime a few times I set off on an adventure to create amazingly huge burgers while avoiding those pesky walking eggs with the aid of pepper.
3. You remember how awesome gaming accessories used to be.
The Power glove. The Power pad. The NES Advantage joystick. Just some of the awesome old accessories Nintendo offered to improve your gaming experience. I remember wanting the advantage joystick so bad because it had more than just two buttons. Now these days every controller has like 10 buttons at least. Also the NES Max Pad had turbo buttons that you could enable. That way you would not have to break you thumb smashing the A or B button over and over and over again. The Power Pad too was way ahead of its time having you work out while having fun. These days most Wii games do that. Back in the day though unless you were a world class thumb wrestler gaming systems did nothing but entertain you.
2. You remember when Arcade games were even better than console games.
When I was young I wanted to go to a bowling alley near my house called Bowler City all the time. Was it because I had dreams of becoming the next great PBA star? Hell no, Bowler City had The Simpsons Arcade game. I would pump quarter after quarter into that arcade game and play as Marge trying to defeat the evil Mr. Burns with my deadly vacuum cleaner. I never did it but damn did I have fun trying. Other games like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Later released on XBL), X-Men and Mortal Kombat were huge successes in the arcades around the world. Hell a few years ago Koz and I walked up and down an entire boardwalk down the shore checking every single arcade for WWF’s Wrestlefest since it might have been our favorite wrestling game ever.
And finally…
1. Up down left right A B B A
If you don’t know what this means, you are not an old school gamer. I rest my case.

